Reviewed by Jenny LeComte
Rating: 8 Beans
've decided to tackle this shocker to save my fellow Bad Movie Night reviewer Lee Rosevere from a fate worse than "Trainspotting".
While most sequels tend to be disappointing, "Grease 2''is abominable. It contains none of the catchy tunes, high-powered dance numbers, likeable characters or kitsch appeal of the original.In fact, any links between "Grease 2'' and the original "Grease'' are tenuous at best.
The tedious action revolves around English exchange student Maxwell Caulfield. Yes, this character - played very poorly by Michael Carrington - is named after the angst-ridden hero in JD Salinger's brilliant novel "Catcher In The Rye''. Sacrilege!!!
Maxwell is supposed to be a cousin of Olivia Newton-John's character, Sandy, in the original film. Sandy, by the way, is Australian, not British. Can't these bloody American film makers tell the difference between an Aussie and a Pom? Fair dinkum! Wise up, you lot.
Upon enrolling at Rydell High School, Maxwell falls instantly in love with Stephanie Zinone (Michelle Pfeiffer). Stephanie is the leader of the Pink Ladies, the hottest clique at school. Meeting a clean-cut, handsome and bland English schoolboy does absolutely nothing for her libido. Steph's into greasers, drop-outs and drop-kicks.
Steph repels Maxwell's advances and puts him firmly in his place by singing a woeful number called "Cool Rider". Maxwell doesn't take the rejection well. He buys himself a second-hand motorbike and learns how to ride it in one day (wow, what a quick study!)
After about a week, Maxwell is able to do Evil Keneval-style stunts. He takes to riding around with a sun-visor pulled over his face to mask his true identity. He rescues Steph from a sticky situation and she, naturally, falls instantly in lerve with the masked biker.
The rest of the movie, which is slower than a wet week of Sundays, concerns Maxwell's moral dilemma. Should he or shouldn't he reveal his true identity to Stephanie? Maxwell's angst and Stephanie's infatuation with the masked biker are used as an excuse for a host of dreary musical numbers. Let's put it this way. If somebody gave me the "Grease 2'' CD for my birthday, I would have no hesitation in turning it into an ashtray.
The ending of "Grease 2'' is predictable enough. Maxwell unmasks and Steph decides he's a pretty cool guy after all. They dance off into the sunset with the rest of the cast and do a medley of terrible songs.
Michelle Pfeiffer cannot sing. Michael Carrington cannot sing. In fact, none of the unfortunate cast of this truly woeful movie can sing, dance or act. The best way to watch "Grease 2'' is in bed with a bucket beside it.
Other reviews for this movie:
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