For Richer or Poorer
Reviewed by Ken M. Wilson
Rating: 9.5 Beans
he number one rule of being a television actor, in my book, is to always pay respect to your fans for they are the ones that have helped you become who you are. Only slightly less known is the number two rule, when you have become popular DO NOT try your luck on the big screen. Such past offenders of this statute have been David Caruso, Justine Batemen, Jennifer Aniston, and most recently, Tim Allen... again. As if "Jungle2Jungle" wasn't enough of a forewarning to the movie-going public, people have shown out in droves to see his latest attempt at big screen acting.
Alongside "comedy" veteran Kirstie Alley, Allen is consistenly unfunny for one hundred and fifteen minutes. Both play the Sextons, a couple of pompous and fake gold-diggers that throw lavish parties and charge expenses by the bucketload. When Wayne "Ah Ah Ahh!" Knight, their accountant, manages to abscond $5 million from Sexton Enterprises the IRS comes looking for the attempting-to-divorce Allen and Alley for it was their names on the returns. What to do, what to do... oh, I know, let's hide out with the Amish.
This movie was deplorable. Now, I liked "Witness" so I have absolutely nothing against the Amish... don't get me wrong. "For Richer or Poorer" was intended to be a comedy but failed almost as miserably as "Bean." The jokes were either mediocre or completely missed -- the "Minute Lice" joke (which is older than googleplex-generian Betty White) actually managed to get a few chuckles from Scoot and Bjula. I, however, sat in utter discomfort as the age-old format of wrong-doers look inside their hearts to heal themselves with the help of the axe-weilding Amish. We've all seen these types of films, right? All in all, I'll bet that you can't guess the ending. Like I said, we've all seen these types of films.
Kirstie Alley has and always be an attractive woman -- it's the annoyingly sexy voice I think. I was almost glad to see her back on the celluloid scene. As for the other half of the movie's cast, I wish that there were stricter laws involved in the prosecution of cocaine dealers because perhaps the legal system could have done something about keeping Tim Allen locked up and not letting him inflict us with his drab comedic "skills."
While not as perfect a "Bad Movie Night" as other films, "For Richer or Poorer" ranks almost as highly as all possible... 9 1/2 beans.
Fun things to do during the movie: nothing... absolutely nothing.
Other reviews for this movie: